Catching up

Its been awhile since my last post, okay so its been since the beginning of August. What can I say its been a really strange month.

Stressful and emotionally draining, I not sure why but its been a month of emptiness. Strange how when you just start thinking that things are going well... then you crash and burn all over again. I have not really been doing anything more than working, school work, house work, watching TV and sleeping.

I have not even been to the gym since July, all I know is that I need to get back into the swing of things. You know its gotten bad when I have not been out in over month. Just don't seem to want to be bothered.

I just have to find my way out of this rut and begin again. I'm hoping that my mothers visit will help me on this road. So many things have been going on around me yet I seem to be moving forward in slow motion at times (everywhere but at work) which seems to be nothing but go, go, go.

Anyway... I just thought I would post and provide everyone with an update. I know that things will get back to normal soon its just a combination of the fall weather and everything else.

Until next time... keep smiling! I know that I'm starting to again.

A MUST share moment...

You will very rarely find me posting things like this, however my friend Wendy sent this link and it had me rolling on the floor laughing... and running scared all at the same time. Do you think this will some day be the norm?



http://aclu.org/pizza/images/screen.swf

What was I thinking...

Really what was I thinking...Go for a tattoo and not have been drinking heavily prior?

Yup, I did just that. Saturday was just another day and my friends Matt and Kasey had already decided that they were going to get a tattoo, after all Kasey has only been talking about it for what seems to be forever.

You see it all began a week prior to my 41st birthday after drinking way too much at the pool I decided to talk about getting a tattoo, why I don't really know. Mostly because I could and no one was going to tell me differently. Anyway we discussed going on the weekend of my birthday, however I really did not know what I wanted or where. As you know these questions must be answered with great consideration, you don't want to just jump off the bridge and then half way down decide that was not what you should have done.

As the story continues we approach last Thursday night; once again we were out for dinner and drinks this time with another friend Melanie and low and behold the subject came up again, this time Kasey mentioned it. I thought oh god, I have to make up my mind.

Well I went to work on Friday and during lunch surfed until I found what I liked, but the endless question for not only myself as I would shortly find out, but also everyone in my life would reveal its ugly head...."Why a lizard" Great question, quick google it and have an answer ready, yes that is exactly what I did. What was that? you want to know what I found, well I found the following:

"The lizard represents basking in the sun. Some say its a symbol of awareness. Ancient Greeks say it is a symbol of all that we hold true and dear."

Sounded great to me; however while this interpretation of someone else's thoughts provided comfort to those around me, for myself it was the memories that it invoked. Those memories of living in Florida and great times that I had while living there and times shared with friends and family.

You see my favorite story of all time was when I returned home from a trip from out of state and walked in the house and looked around to see what changed (this was necessary, first so that I would not trip over any furniture that was moved and secondly, if I had not noticed the changes I would have been in the dog house for at least a week) and I noticed that there were these two lizards on the wall... "Wow" what great art work and where ever did you find those, I asked. Well to my surprise the answer was "out in the yard they must have gotten in when I had the door open".

So for all my friends and family, in the words of my favorite radio newscaster Paul Harvey ..."That's the rest of the story!"













Thanks to my friends who stood by me and laughed at my funny looks of pain. Without you in my life it would be a very lonely and boring existence.

A Red Maple Tree...

I'm reminded of a quote from Everett Mámor;

"We can learn a lot from trees: they're always grounded but never stop reaching heavenward."

On this day, one of many milestones; my Dad bought a tree in the memory of Jamie. What he did not realize was that this particular day 27 JUL 09 holds greater meaning and the fact that we planted this beautiful tree on it gives me more reasons to appreciate its grandeur.

You see this would have been our 22nd Anniversary and so the fact that this tree was planted on this day will provide me with a constant reminder of Jamie and our love.

Trees are majestic, resilient and every growing. They provide shade to our homes, clean air to our world and beauty like none other. Trees are like old friends and they grow with us and our families.


They are natures gifts to us yet, we don't always appreciate what we are given.


Thank you to my Dad for this gift. One that will keep on giving year after year and lets not forget the joy it will give me every time I see it and remember my dear friend.

Pictures

I thought I would share a few pictures that I took a few years ago during one of my vacations.

It's been a while...

Okay so I've been really bad and have not posted anything for a while... a long while. As one of my friends said today " you've lost that blogging feeling.." you know the rest of the song.

So what's been going on... Well I took a week off to relax and sit by the pool (okay so I was going to clean the house out too). Funny thing about that was that it rained and the weather was really shitty for most of the week. I did however have a great birthday! The night of my birthday Don, Matt and Kasey took me out to dinner (Mexican of course). Later that night we went out and when I say we it way Don myself and Matt! Yes he went out with us. We hit three bars and as you can believe I got totally crocked off my butt (Don thanks for driving). I should have know it was coming with the shots of Jose and beer and then moving to whiskey (what the heck was I thinking).

Needless to say Thursday was a lost day... Slept all day and finally felt better around 11pm. The weekend was okay went out Friday and Saturday night. I finally deiced on Sunday to clean the house. So much stuff!

Work was as usual work. I went to dinner on Wednesday with two of my friends and we took the tour of Atlanta, they have not really gotten out to see the sights. Great company! Friday night was Joe's and those of you that know me, its unusual for me not to be there.

Saturday was a run around day and then Saturday night I went to dinner with another friend. They finally opened a CPK in Norcoss! We both had the Greek pizza... all I can say is that is was different and good. Work this week has been a rush to get caught up as the boss is out of town all week and the office has been very empty...

I made the decision to transfer schools in January mostly because everyone else was doing it and it made sense to do so. I can now get the Hope scholarship (money for books) because the school is based in Georgia (now I have an excuse to go back to Savanah!). The weeks are only 5.5 weeks and I will be able to finish my degree a year earlier. They also offer MBA so once I'm done with my degree its time to move on to the masters, after all this way I wont have to pay the bill yet!


Its now Wednesday and I'm running around cutting the lawn, cleaning the house and getting ready for the arrival of my Dad. He will be visiting from Friday until Tuesday, I personally think it a little too much time for him (he gets bored when he has nothing to do and he's worst than a 4 year old) oh well, it will be nice to see him again.

It's been a tuff few weeks, trying to figure out what I'm doing with my life and what will happen next. I'm trying to get back into the dating world...well not trying very hard yet! Hopefully seeing my Dad will help I've just been in a funk for the last few weeks and not sure what the issue is, All I know is it sucks!

Till next time...
Jeff

Vacation on my mind

Yes it's true I have vacation on my mind. Today at work I did a lot, however I just kept thinking that its just one more day. Just one more day (good thing I didn't ruby slippers on or I might have been clicking my heals).

This vacation is about relaxing and re-energizing. Its the first year that I will not be going away, and its the first time in 22 years that I will be spending all this down time by myself (well at least when I'm home, sorry Hershey does not count). Its going to be strange. I have no plans, well that's not entirely true I would like to get somethings done around the house and I do plan on going out and getting totally smashed a few nights. After all that's what vacation is all about, adult beverages. Okay so I told my friends Matt and Kasey that I would go with them this weekend to get a tattoo, as you can guess I am chickening out. I just can decide what I want and where to get it (please keep your thoughts G rated). I don't want to rush into it as you know once its done, its done! I told them maybe the following weekend, once I have a chance to think about it some more.

School is going well I have just one class this term (thank god) it started off bumpy however its getting better. Its Ethics in the Legal Environment which sounds worst than it really turned out to be.

I did get a new book last week Angels and Demons and I just can't wait to really have some time to start reading it. Speaking of reading, I so miss Anne Rice and her vampire books they always kept me up at night (could never stop reading them). These days she is writing religious books (don't really see myself getting into those... ha,ha).

Well I'm going to take the next few days and disconnect the computer from my hands and relax and party with my friends. I wish you all an outstanding July 4th and remember its just not an excuse for partying, please take a moment and remember what it really means, be thankful and be kind to everyone around you.

Oh, by the way..my niece (well J's) gave birth a little boy a few weeks ago, I'm so happy for her and Jason!

Till next time my friends..

"Liberty is the right to choose. Freedom is the results of the right choice" - Unknown

A New Day

So a day has past since I last posted. Nothing has really changed, survived yet another Sunday and managed to not eat everything in the house... thankfully!

Sunday was pretty serene. Just worked on clearing out some of the clutter in this monster house; you really need to ask yourself once in a while why do I have so many things? I don't know about you but I have more linens and bed sets than I think they even carry at Bed Bath and Beyond. That man could spend money honey. I'm now figuring out where it went (stuffed in closets, drawers, and any other place I did not care to look). Bless his heart though the house always looked a like model home.

I'm not sure what the issue was last night but I just could not seem to sleep. May be I was just so excited about going back to the gym....not (well at least not that excited). I save that excitement for other things (wink, wink).

I just got off the phone with one of my friends, he lost his mom just a few weeks ago and is experiencing a lot of same things I recently encountered. I must say its not easy. It should not be easy, but you just need to do what's best for you. He's such a wonderful person and is so caring I'm glad that his partner is there to support him during this transition time. I say transition because in reality that's what it is, moving from one emotional plane to another. Its hard to let go; but the truth is you really never do let go, you just learn to accept the change/loss.

Well enough babbling for now... I'm just going to work on my "to do" list and wait (not very patiently, might I add) to hear from another friend.

Just a thought about the value of your friends:

"Your friends will know you better in the first minute they meet you than your acquaintances will know you in a thousand years."

~ Richard Bach

A day like no other...

Okay, so the day started off with me releasing some energy and writing about how I've been feeling. I got a chance to meet up with one of my friends during lunch (where she works as a chef). The food was outstanding and the chance (planned or not planned, I'll let you decide that one) meeting of a possible new friend which made my day.

Of course I had to spend some time at the pool, I mean what would I do if my tan faded in the middle of the summer? Lets be real here. I packed my cooler(adult beverages of course) and floated around the pool. Bill and his niece showed up with Ella and Molly of course you know I had to go play with the kids. After all I'm just a big kid myself. It was all fun and games until I remembered that I had to do my posting for that damn Ethics class (week three and I'm all ready thinking...is it over yet?).

Finished my posting and just sitting and relaxing now. Tomorrow will be another day of possible adventure then again it just might be a day of sleep. The gym is closed on Sundays and its been nearly a week and a half since I went (had to be to work early all week) and I'm jonesing for a good work out. I hate to say it... Monday is looking good!

My closing thought is this simple yet powerful statement:

Funny thing when you meet someone, you know instantly if your going to like them and today was one of those days. Enough said....for now.

Friends

Friends are wonderful people, they fill your life with joy and understanding. They are there when you need them the most, and as I found out over the last few days they are also the catalyst for change.

I say this because your friends sometimes know that change is necessary, even when you're not quite ready. One of my friends just recently has decided that I need to get out and meet a few new friends. I'm okay with this change, it never hurts to have more friends. After all that's what life is all about... surrounding yourself with family and friends.

I certainly would not have been able to survive for the last few months without all of my wonderful friends, their love and compassion has been more than I could have ever expected. I'm so grateful to be so blessed to have all of them in my life. As I sit and type this post, it reminds me of Jamie and it while everyone thinks that I'm doing well it brings tears to my eyes thinking about our friends and how much I miss him. He always told me that I need to continue to live my life and enjoy every precious moment. I have been in my own way, trying to sort out everything that has happened over the last few months.

While I'm beginning to find my way, I often stop and wonder what's next and how will I face tomorrow with out my best friend. I have the comfort of my memories to keep close at hand and I know that is what he wanted me to do. So with these words that I type I'm reminded of one of my favorite quotes:

“The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet our lessons come from the journey, not the destination.” - Don Williams

Its been a long enjoyable road for me for the past 22 years and while the last few miles (months) have been the most challenging. I see a twist up ahead and know that when I get to it there will be a turn. A turn that will set me in a new direction and while I've enjoyed this road, its now time step out side my comfort zone and begin to live again...

What does all this mean? That my friends is a great question. I guess I will find out as I being to move forward, with all my friends at my side.

Jeff

The begining....

Okay so this is what I consider the beginning of something totally new for me. I've never been one to slow down enough to share my thoughts or personal moments; however over the last few months the world has taught me that I need to look at things from a different angle.

So this is my new angle, to be open minded about new things and to live each day as a new adventure. After all isn't that what life is all about?

I guess that's all I have for now. Check back soon to see what's new and exciting.

Jeff